How do humans dislike each other? Does the brain release some sort of chemical, similar to when we are excited? How is it that a person can just dislike some one's voice that much? Or am I the only one? Why do voices affect me so much? Or am I a superficial person? Maybe I'm too harsh on people? Why am I so disturbed? Why couldn't I control my temper like I always do? How did I lose control?

How did I manage to just show my anger like that? I don't understand why I couldn't control my emotions. Somehow, I just spoke before thinking about the consequences. Of course, no one in my class were greatly affected by it since they are the sort who would only take it seriously if someone shouts at the class. But I never shout when I am angry. Therefore no one took me seriously.

On the other hand, I was greatly upset with myself. It didn't and still doesn't make sense for me to just lose my composure like that. I rarely show my anger and even if I did, I would do it in a discrete manner so that I wouldn't make a fool of myself. And I did make a great big fat fool out of my conduct. Everyone just laughed it off, thinking I wasn't serious. Well, I was too angry to shout and I don't understand why people would waste the effort to shout at someone you really dislike. Shouting is when you are only irritated and wish for someone to quit annoying you.

I am having difficulties sleeping recently. My mother says it's stress but I can't really find the cause of it. There's something missing. Or rather, there's something that has been bugging me. I wonder if it's because I am upset with not controlling my anger as well or if it's because of my studying. Thus, I have been really sleepy these few days although I just can't sleep - not even during daytime. The worst thing that happens every night after I fall asleep is that I will wake up at weird hours, such as 2am or 4am.

However, I don't think my sleeping difficulty has got anything to do with the anger management matter since this problem started before that.
On a lighter note, Deborah taught me that court shoes can become 'fishes'. She tied her pair of court shoes in a plastic bag. The way she did it was exactly the same as how the lady at the market would tie the fish. =D

The questions for Paper 1 surprised me. I then wrote about something personal. I usually write stories based on daily stuff, or my own life. If it's personal, of course I will change it to a happy story, otherwise the teachers will comment that it's too depressing and dreary.
The comprehension was about some Baginda Sutan guy and a haunted hill in Malaysia. Oh, and the tiger kind of made a big impact on me.

While I was walking home on one of those days, there was a guy who suddenly called out "chiobu". I then turned around to see who was that comment directed at. There was no one behind so I guess it was either me or the group of guys he was with at that moment. Since I didn't know what on earth did that term mean and it sort of made me curious since my cousin used it before, I asked Sean what it meant. According to him, it means "pretty girl", which, he stressed, wasn't me. Well, I wonder what is becoming of Singaporean boys then - calling other boys pretty girls. That's a scary thought. Hahas, anyway, it sounds more like a vulgar remark to me.

We started on netball for PE this term. At least it's not as bad as volley ball. Although I still got hit. This time it wasn't a ball, but it was a hand. My cheek still hurts...Jaclyn really has tough fists. We were both trying to catch the ball and somehow, her arm shot out and made contact with my left cheek. Hahas, I kind of blanked out for a few seconds.

Since I have not been blogging for a while, I shall add in some happenings from the week before.
The holiday week was alright, I guess. Just that I'm paying back big time for the hours I'd slept. During the September holidays, I go to bed at around twelve each night and wake up at about seven to eight in the next morning. And compare it to my usual sleeping hours during school days. Oh well. These few mornings have been a hellish experience for me since I have to revert to waking up before Mr Sun comes out to greet the skies. But I have trouble sleeping since last week. Even though I may go to bed at eleven or twelve, I can only sleep at one...

And I almost missed Redhill MRT station this morning if not for my mum poking me awake.
From two incidents that happened within a span of two weeks, I have thus concluded that my school skirt is prone to behaving like Marilyn Monroe's trademark dress.

Incident #1
Last Friday, as there was choir, I didn't bother to change out of my skirt and went to meet my mum for dinner in it. After eating, while walking back, we were crossing the road to reach my block. Unfortunately, I sort of slipped at the curb while a motorcycle drove past. And, it was pretty embarrassing when my skirt flipped up. Thank goodness I was wearing shorts underneath. It was pretty rude of that motorcyclist to laugh at me while driving past though. =/

Incident #2
This afternoon, I was walking with Pamela to the canteen to look for Sihui. Geraldine didn't see what happened as she was walking with Zoey at the back. Anyway, there was this gush of wind and yes, my skirt flew up again. And the same thing repeated when I was walking home. Oh joy.

I don't really have much to post about. These are some memorable quotes from the two weeks. Most of them are from choir.

Quite a few people forgot to bring their PE shirts to school last week for the ACES day workout. Anyway, I think I failed miserably in the dance workout. I did not know what I was doing... We had to separate into our houses after the workout for the mass dance. We got to see each house dance their very own creation. Although Keller had some initial technical hiccups, we got the first prize!!! Yes, I love Keller the most. Of course, we got our own free class interaction after the mass dance segment. Alas, Ms Li was so busy chatting with her fellow teacher that she was pretty late in her arrival. Mr Tham also had to wait for her as we wanted to blind-fold both of them. It was quite fun though. And we used the councillors' ties as blind-folds. We then led them into their kingdom, where everyone was waiting to crown our beloved teachers.

The two teachers gave us their royal "speech" in the classroom after that. Overall, this year's concert was great =D
Since I told Victoria that I will meet her at TK, I went there after meeting my mum for lunch at Bugis.

It is kind of weird meeting your childhood friends after two years. When I say childhood friends, I mean those that I met since young. Like Cynthia, whom I have known since I think...kindergarden to Primary six? And the rest like Melissa and Don are those that I have known since Primary one. Hahas, They actually look the same to me. I didn't really know how to talk to them since the atmosphere was really tense. Plus, the other three are in the same Secondary school. All of us then waited for Victoria to come while chatting with the teachers individually.

After Victoria came, things became a bit better but I still found communication tough. I kind of feel left out now, hahas. Cynthia and Melissa were friendly though. And I wonder what's with the NPCC trend. Yeow Yang, Weng Lun and Don all joined NPCC. Anyway, Mrs Quek invited all of us to return for the Christmas party at the end of this year. Urgh, I don't know if I really want to go now...
Even after Shermine came, it was still quiet. Karen and I more or less ignored each other since we were not that close anyway. Hahas, and I couldn't talk to Don since it was too strange...what can you say to someone who argued with you over the most insignificant things since Primary one. -.-
Anyway, maybe it's because I left TK earlier than them in Primary six, therefore I'm not really that close to them anymore. Still, it makes me feel so old...remembering the days whereby all of us played together. That was in Primary one to four, I think. After that, most of us were not as close. There was Pei Yi, Hui Xuan, Weng Lun, Qian Yi and uhm, I forgot the last person's name. Oh gosh, am I really that old?

Saturday was spent with Mummy and Auntie Shirlene in Orchard Road. We went to some Chinese restaurant at Paragon for lunch. The chicken was good but I couldn't finish my share. I got sick of the chicken after a while ( most of the dishes had meat ). It was pretty much the usual actually. After lunch, the adults sat at some cafe to chat through maybe two hours. Auntie Shirlene said that I should pack some cup noodles if I'm going to Europe. That's if the trip to Prague really comes true. After all, ten days without rice or noodles may kill me. And I have to remember to bring some medication otherwise I will kill myself during the flight.

We are currently learning "If We Hold on Together" in my guitar class now. Unfortunately, I have no confidence to learn the piece since the page is full of barre chords. At least I have two weeks to learn the chorus =D
Oh well, there's choir later. Ta.