I've finally started editing on the photos I took during my trip to South Korea two years ago. Yes, I didn't type anything wrong. It has indeed been two years and I have not bothered to touch them ever since I dumped them all into my computer files - till now. 

I don't edit my photos usually but I had the intention to do so for my South Korea trip since the photos taken were mostly too dark due to the poor lighting (it was winter). Since I edited about ten out of the hundreds I took, I think it'd take another two years for me to finish editing all of them. Well, I might be able to finish all by the end of the holidays since I'm only editing the lighting. I'm a lazy person. I admire those who can go through hundreds of photos and edit their faces and bodies one by one. I've only tried to edit my face and Mummy's wrinkles once. The result was quite strange unfortunately. 

Anyway, since I've edited a few photos, I decided to upload one (or two) onto my tumblr page. It's not as populated with Kpop posts now, so don't worry about getting bombarded by Super Junior posts! This is the first time I'm uploading a photo onto Tumblr actually. I usually just reblog images, GIFs or put up quotes. It's quite ridiculous that I'm only uploading a photo onto the site when I've been having it for about a year now, isn't it? It's also a little strange uploading the photos since they were taken in winter, during the Christmas period. Maybe I should keep them and post them here when Christmas comes! I'll have months to finish editing them then!

Moving on, I'm officially free from school now! My last CA10 of my first academic year was completed yesterday. I'll have more time to blog now. The only thing left to do is to wait for my results and maybe get a job during the holidays. I hope I'll be able to pass French - I didn't do well for the last exam. Oh well. 

By the way, I never knew there was a lighthouse at Fort Canning Park! I was there during my VPPP CA10 filming and saw this! 

Does this mean the sea used to be at Fort Canning area? 

I visited to Singapore Science Center with Cong Han last week. The place has undergone some major changes. I barely recognized it anymore! We managed to cover the whole area, including the Dinosaur Exhibition. We just didn't go to the IMAX theater or Snow City.

I remember going to a dinosaur exhibition in the Science Center with my parents when I was around seven or eight. It was the second exhibition I went to (the first was about the human body). At that point of time, I hid behind my father's thigh. It was a pretty conflicting moment for my seven-year-old self. I was fascinated by the dinosaurs and wanted to get near to them. But I panicked each time mummy pushed me forward and froze behind my father who was my makeshift shield. 

This time was pretty much the same. I was reluctant to get near them initially. I had to remind myself that they were just mere machines in my mind repeatedly. This dinosaur exhibition is entirely different from the one I went to before and I managed to pose (albeit reluctantly) for a few photos after a while though. There were not many people inside - only a few school children on their school excursion. It's embarrassing how they aren't affected by the dinosaurs at all. I think I've underestimated my zoophobia. I know very well that the dinosaurs are not the real deal - but I must admit I had half the mind to run out of the place, screaming my head off. I don't have any photos of the dinosaur exhibits since Cong Han was the one taking photos in there. I was too preoccupied with posing to take any. 

Cong Han and I went out soon afterwards and bought keychains with our photo on them. Mummy said it's a waste of money when I showed it to her when I got home later. But I wanted a photo of the both of us! Oh well. At least I now know how tourists attractions are able to rip people off with photo-taking business gimmicks!

Disclaimer: 
This post was written on New Year's day but it wasn't published. Till now, that is.

2011 has been quite a year for me. I was initially hesitant about going to a polytechnic. I must admit that I had some preconceived notions about polytechnics based on what my teachers and seniors told me. But I don't reget going to SP.

I really ought to be starting on my other projects and scripts now, but I'm so mentally drained after a whole week of editing concepts, presentations, writing and brainstorming for new ideas. I can't bring myself to start on my CA10s yet. Well, at least not tonight. 

There are quite a few unpublished posts in my Blogger account right now. I just never found the time to complete those posts. One of them is my 2011 summary post. I usually sum up a whole year's events and thoughts in one post during New Year but I failed to do that for 2011. Another that I promised but failed to post would be the LEAP camp post. 

Well, I've finally completed and published the post about LEAP camp. I doubt anyone would read the whole post since it's very long. I could not think of any other way to post about it though. Read the post below! 

Next update would include 2011's summary post!

Since it's been ages since I last posted, it's going to be quite a long post. You've been warned!

We had to attend a workshop and briefing for the two days before LEAP camp. Monday (which was the first day) went well. We chugged through all the seven habits that the camp was based on. It was nice to meet four of my classmates after such a long break - Zhao-yi, Shaw, Matin and Wai Meng. And although I sat with my classmates during the workshop, I befriended the people from the neighbouring table. In fact, I got to know Serene, Gui Yu, Clare, Mark, Hui Juan and Benjamin by the end of the first day.

The second day was much shorter. I was expecting it to be as long as the first but we got to go home by noon. We played a few ice-breakers before having the brief about the camp. There was also a revised packing list given to us. Thank goodness I'd only packed my sleeping bag in, so it didn't make much of a difference to me. They then divided us into our camp groups.

Joey, Stefanie, Shaw and I were talking about which animal each of us bear a resemblance to this evening. It was mostly thanks to Abdul Matin who is still continuing with his cow jokes actually. Funnily, the animal they said I was like was a polar bear. I've gotten comments that I look like a hamster, a guinea pig, a bunny and even a cow (no thanks to Matin), but never a polar bear. I mean, polar bears are one of my favourite animals so I don't mind it at all. But it was quite a surprise to me all the same. 

Stefanie went on to remark that I'm like a polar bear because of the wintry feel I give off. Shaw and Joey also agreed that I am quite a cold person at times. I never really thought that I appear to have a cold aura around me. To be honest, many have said that I'm a distant person despite my friendly exterior. I wonder if it means that I'm intimidating. 

Happy Chinese New Year!

I'm pretty sure hardly anyone comes here anymore, since I've not updated the site for such a long time. Well, I've been a little busy recently. Projects have been coming consecutively and our class has been trying to tackle all of them. We've got no choice but to do nearly every CA only at the last minute because we were trying to finish yet another CA before that. My projects are issued back to back as usual. I know Year 2 would be tougher though. 

Anyway, this year's Lunar New Year isn't as festive as the past new years. Mummy and I didn't prepare much this year. There's hardly any decoration around the house and we didn't do much for spring cleaning. Another thing that's different this year is the fact that my cousins have outgrown video games. I used to watch them play games like 'Halo' or 'Super Mario' every year but they seem to have tired of it. Most of them are more interested in gambling now. The few who refuse to gamble (like me) played cards and board games instead. I managed to win twice at 'Monopoly Deal' which is the card version of the traditional 'Monopoly' game. Everyone was shocked, considering how bad I am at strategic games! 

Each year I see my cousins (and nieces) growing steadily. The older cousins are now starting to settle down one by one to have their own families. My aunts and uncles are ageing bit by bit too. Some are even grandparents already. It's a little scary how fast time flies. I have also found out that I have more cousins that I'd thought this year. I don't just have 17 cousins on my mum's side - there are more! I think my family is quite big sometimes. I might have some rich long-lost relative somewhere in Asia. Who knows? 

I had a heart-to-heart talk with Mummy last night and today. I've not been myself recently. It's been a long time since I'd spoken so much to Mummy and it made me realise that keeping quiet isn't the best way to solve any problem. Everything just snowballs into a huge mess usually. 

It's also the first time Mummy told me about the past in such a detailed manner. The two of us have our own different traumas and scars. I never stop marveling at how Mummy has brought me up on her own. My childhood wasn't as cheerful as most of my peers. I hardly laughed. It was rare for me to even smile to anyone. 

I remember there was this pair of brothers who made me smile though. I can't remember their names or how they looked like anymore. I was in kindergarten at that time, and my parents would bring me to the playground near my school. I'm not sure if the playground is still there since I don't go back anymore, but it was near Gongshan Primary school and my babysitter's old place. We'd jump up and down on this 'bridge'. Sometimes the three of us would just lie down on it and stare at the stars. This was the only happy memory I had of my kindergarten days - even if the boys were not from my kindergarten at all. I never went back to the place after I graduated. 

Funny how a simple childhood memory could still be so clear in my head. I might not know how the people looked like exactly, but I could remember how it felt on the 'bridge' and how pretty the stars were. I've always liked to look at the skies and make shapes out of the clouds. But I think I found out how pretty the night sky is like with the stars and moon too after knowing the two boys at the playground. I wonder how they are doing now. 

Crying so hard for so long on the first day of a new year doesn't feel good at all. 

I originally intended to blog about the awesome fireworks and events that happened on New Year's Eve, but I doubt I'm in the state to do so. I have yet to post about 2011 as a whole too. Seems like my first day of 2012 didn't turn out so well after all. 

Sometimes I wish I had a sibling. So that I don't have to uphold so many expectations. So that I wouldn't be compared to the ideal daughter when there'd be another child to compare against instead. So that I'd have someone to confide in without feeling like I'm being a burden to him or her when I cry or speak. 

Well, but on the bright side, at least I had a good cry. I just need to stop crying now. I can't seem to stop. 

Happy New Year, everyone. I'm sorry for the sombre mood.

(via candycanechristmas)

Did you use to write letters to Santa Claus?

Sometimes I find it difficult to express my thoughts and feelings in words. I know it's funny, since I'm studying in a writing course. I should have absolutely no problems coming up with an adequate description or expression of my inner self. But somehow it's difficult for me to do that. I come up with strange analogies instead. I think that's how I got the 'weird' label among my peers too.

Another problem is that I'm not exactly fantastic at showing my emotions. I've lost count of the number of people I've disappointed with my reactions to their surprises. I just freeze up and end up with a bland face, when that's not what I'm feeling at that moment actually. It seems too forced when I try to smile and give a big reaction too. I think I could be having my own fireworks showcase inside of me while the poker face is being shown to the world instead. Could it be that I lack in the emotional quotient department? 

Whenever I get happy, I get scared. Because I know I'll be sad again.
Dragon Squad (2005) 

(via http://www.fond-ecran-image.com)

There's something so magical about a baby's hands that makes them seem so surreal. I can't picture myself having such tiny hands at all. Was I ever that small? 

It feels as if the holidays are already here. Since I don't have MST (Mid-Semester Test), the only projects I'm working on right now are my CA2s which are due in January. I'm quite nervous and apprehensive about the pitching process and the story synopses we have to make. Hope all my stories won't get shot down!

I've also sat for my French exam. To be honest, I didn't study a lot for it. I only revised a few days before and I'm lucky that the exam wasn't too tough. Pascal told Ziwei, Joey and me to write "omelette du fromage" if we got stuck. It means cheese omelette, if I'm not wrong. I'm not sure if I'll do well, but I'll pass. I got 87 for the previous exam, so hopefully, the results for this exam wouldn't pull it down too much!

Friday was also the opening of the Singaporean branch of Lush at Wisma Atria. Ziwei, Stefanie and me went to visit Shahidah who's working there. The entire shop was packed with customers and slabs of soap were stacked everywhere. Each piece of soap is handmade and have unique names like 'Porridge', 'Karma', 'The Godmother', and even 'Dragon Egg'. I love 'Rock Star'. It's a pretty shade of pink and it smells so sweet! I'm returning to the shop once I find the time to buy it! 

Shahidah led us around the shop and told us about the different types of soaps and the stories attached to them. It's amazing how she could remember everything! There are about 200 products to memorise and she has already memorised a good part of nearly all of them! I never really thought about the amount of things a salesgirl has to learn and memorise in her training before this. Well, now I know. 

The next day was spent singing, eating and talking. After lunch at Pastamania, we went to Kbox. Joey, CX, Shaw, Stefanie and I spent the next few hours there singing as many songs as we could. Ziwei came only after three hours - we actually thought he wasn't coming at all. It was really fun singing nonsense and even though a lot of people cancelled on us, I think it was still a great outing. My voice kept trembling when I sang too, since it was freezing the room. It's pretty funny, now that I think about it. 

I later met Cong Han at Vivo for dinner. While waiting for him, I decided to visit Page One. It was my first time in the store and I didn't expect it to be so big! Their literature section has so many classics - I think it might be more than Kinokuniya's! I didn't buy any books though. I need to save money to buy Christmas presents soon. Oh well. 

We had a takeaway dinner at the open space at the top level of Vivo. I didn't even know there was such a place. Maybe it's because I usually keep to the first two levels. Plus, each time I go to the third level, it's to take the monorail to Sentosa. Oh, but it looks pretty at night with all the lights around. We even saw fireworks in the sky, thanks to a performance going on in Sentosa! Coupled with the Christmas carols playing in the background and the lighting, it's as if Christmas is already here! Seems like the cold weather also gives everyone the Christmas-y feeling, doesn't it? Just thinking about it makes me feel like doing some Christmas shopping soon...

The time-gap between my posts is getting longer. Well, it's not like I have readers who check on this site regularly anyway. But here I am, trying to breathe some life into this place. Or type some life, in this case. This is an awfully long post, by the way. 

I think I ought to post about the Writers' Festival before I forget. 

Stella and Ms Gamar managed to get tickets for us for three of the events held during the Singapore Writers' Festival. I chose to go for 'Balancing the Books: Creativity VS the Bottomline', a panel discussion about the compromise between writing and money. Two writers, Michael Chabon and Joe Haldeman, were present and answered many questions which were raised by the moderator and from the floor. I was amused by their frankness and witty remarks. The writers also made clear the difference between writing for money and writing for passion. I'm not sure if I'd ever be a novelist, but one thing's for sure: I do hope that my writing would bring me money in the future. 

I also bought a book 'The Catherine Lim Collection' that features at least four stories written by the Singaporean author. Because I got it from the festival, there was a discount and an autograph from Catherine Lim on one of the pages. This is the first time I'm getting a signed copy for a book! I've read the first story in the book so far ('The Serpent's Tooth') and it's pretty interesting. I never knew that the traditional Chinese way of treating backaches was to make the patient swallow (yes, swallow, not chew!) newborn mice wrapped in salted leaves. I'm not sure of the reason, but the mental image alone is pretty morbid to me! 

We later had lunch at Plaza Singapura when the panel discussion ended. It's seldom that we get to eat as a class. Well, it wasn't really a class actually, since all of us broke up into three groups to eat at McDonald's, Long John Silver's, and Yoshinoya respectively. But I got to eat with Yvette, Hazel, Cong Xu, Chuan Ying, Zhao-yi, Annzy and Zi Wei at Yoshinoya. It's rare to eat with them - except Zi Wei of course. In fact, I just ate dinner with Zi Wei at the Somerset branch of Yoshinoya just a few days before the panel discussion. The time after lunch was spent loitering - DTVM's best at that - or in Internet slang, 'trolling'. It'd be great to go out as a class again. Even if it was a fairly short 'outing' that was somewhat just an extension of going for the panel discussion at SMU on a Sunday. 

Other than the Writers' Festival, there really isn't much to post about. I highly doubt that anyone would be interested in the research papers and concept paper I have to do for my CAs. Oh but I hear that the first CA for my journalism module might be a debate! Sounds a little intimidating yet fun, doesn't it? 

Oh oh oh, and I just got a new dress and a pair of casual shoes over the weekend. It's a beautiful blue dress and I can't wait to wear it! It might be too formal for school but I think I'm going to wear it on my birthday nevertheless. I'm the birthday girl after all! As for the shoes, it's this pretty shade of pink that reminds me of cotton candy! I think Mummy has spent quite a lot on the dress and shoes but she said that they are my birthday gifts! 

To be honest, I usually feel excited for my birthday when I see Christmas decorations being raised in the shopping malls and streets. It's usually an indication that my birthday's coming near since the decorations are usually put up a month and a half before Christmas. Unfortunately, maybe it's because my CAs have taken up so much of my time, I've not gotten the chance to see much of this year's Christmas' decorations. Maybe I ought to make a trip to town soon! 

I've been terribly lazy lately. Well, I have been posting about stuff but I just didn't publish them on my blog because I preferred everything to be in chronological order. And the thing is that, my post about the LEAP camp is an awfully lengthy post on its own. I've not even ended it yet. That's the reason (or excuse, depending on how you see it) for the absence of any new posts or updates on this blog. 

Anyway, I've just decided that I shall post about post-camp events first, at least till I've completed my post about the camp. By then I'd be able to shock you all with one of my longest post ever about a camp. Well, not really the longest, since the one about my trip to South Korea was so long that it covered four posts. I think I'm just a pretty long-winded person. And since this blog kind of doubles up as my personal journal sometimes, albeit with all the bitching and ranting taken out, bear with me, if you can. 

To be honest, I didn't do much after I came back from the camp. I fell ill and spent a good part of the last week of the holidays just being home. I tried to watch more dramas to be able to write my reviews but it wasn't exactly good progress since I couldn't find a few episodes so I couldn't follow the plot properly. Then there were also my stories to tackle. I rewrote a paragraph or so but that's all I did in that week. I should really find time to write a new chapter at least. I'm such a procrastinator, aren't I? 

I also spend a lot of time sleeping. The cough syrup that I took had a drowsy side-effect on me. I vaguely recall dreaming of a few great stories while asleep. But the problem was, I couldn't remember anything when I woke up. Except the fact that it was a really good dream. How do people keep dream diaries? I seldom remember my dreams. Well, I only remember a few particularly vivid parts, or maybe a vague sense of what it was about. 

Anyway, my camp group (we named ourselves 'Shaka Laka Bung Bung', 'Bung Bung' for short) met up on the last Friday of the holidays. It was a little strange initially, seeing everyone out of their camp clothes and talking about things other than the camp activities. We went to town and I got to go to the new H&M outlet there. I must say, the baby clothes are pretty over there! It's as if those little tots you see on the streets have their own haute fashion cult too! 

I didn't get to stay with them to play pool at night, since I had to attend ACER's teambuilding session the morning after. I took the train home with Syafiq and it was nice talking to him - I didn't get to speak much to him during the camp. He told me about his course and if not for him, I wouldn't really know DADP is actually about. I was quite surprised that Syafiq enjoys writing stories too!

The next day was mostly spent in school, where I met the people in ACER for the first time. We played icebreaker games to lighten up the atmosphere. Michelle also told us about the objectives of ACER while the senior told us how to deal with the different types of students they encounter. I wonder if I'll ever be able to be as good as them. I sometimes clam up in front of unfamiliar people (just like how I did in camp). If only I could be myself with friends and strangers alike - just like Matin and Joey who can be so comfortable and affable with everyone. It's funny that I was able to do public speaking before, but when I need to talk to a small group of strangers, I freeze up unconsciously sometimes. 

Anyway, it was altogether a cheerful and fun session with the ACERs and although the seniors offered for us to join them for lunch, I decided to head home. My mum was cooking, after all. I chatted with Syuhaidah on the way back. It's nice getting to meet Syuhaidah again. She was in my group, Masquerade, for CASS FOC. We got to talking about our courses and school in general before our stop eventually came. 

After the weekend came the first week of the second semester, of course. It was exhausting having an 8am-6pm Monday for the first day right after the holidays. I got to learn about the technical stuff, like the camera and we even revised about the different types of shots. Unsurprisingly, I slowly dozed off when we came back to the lab after trying out the big camera outside. It was pretty bad of me since Mr Esman and Ms Gamar were trying to carry on with the lesson despite us being half-dead. We were barely surviving the seven-hour module. 

But otherwise I guess the rest of my modules are pretty much fine. After the first week, I pretty much got used to the timetable and the classes. I mean, I even enjoy VPPP (Video Productions, Principles and Practices; the seven-hour module) now. I still think handling the camera and directing talents could be scary sometimes, but it's really fun editing it and then seeing the fruits of your labour on screen. I'm hoping that I'd be able to do well for my modules though. This semester's modules seem so much tougher with a lot of research involved. There's also the conceptualizing, pitching and script-writing to worry about now. It's not just stories and articles anymore. 

I've succumbed to Tumblr. It's quite interesting and I often reblog stuff that appears on my dashboard every few minutes. To put it simply, it's the ideal site for people who love posting more pictures than huge chunks of text or plain lazy bloggers (like me). I created an account recently. Don't click on the link if you are some anti-Kpop extremist though. Don't say I wasn't kind enough to warn you (I usually can't be bothered).Which reminds me, I still have my empty Wordpress account to take care of. What should I use it for?

That aside, I've been lagging behind in French. With the holidays and whatnot, I've entered the 'lazy bum' mode. I'm sure that when I return to school, French lessons would go back to being a mass of foreign matter to me once more. Why didn't I pick 한굴 in the first place? I find it strange that my cousin Dennis who initially wanted to learn Japanese ended up with French too. Somehow we ended up picking French (and I'm not even sure of the reason). It'd be awesome if I were to be able to master French and Korean someday. I could get a job as a translator! 

Anyway, the past few days have been spent on getting the stuff necessary for my camp next week. I've yet to complete my packing since I had to unearth all the clothes I usually wear for camp. The ones that I won't mind getting torn or dirty. I hope the camp would be fun! The rest of my classmates are in other groups while I'm alone, but I guess that means it'll be easier to make new friends. The camp's in Kota Tinggi (sp?) and I had to get a new passport just for it, since my previous passport was expiring in six months.

Too bad I can't show my cute nine-year-old self as my passport photo. When I used my old passport last year, the airport security took a second glance to check if it's the same person. I must admit it's not surprising some people think that I've undergone some sort of plastic surgery. The difference is quite scary. But I've not gone under the knife and I'm still under-aged for plastic surgery in Singapore. To be honest, I'm not against the idea of people undergoing plastic surgery actually. I think it's alright as long as you come out looking better and you're fine with telling others about it. Plus it takes guts to go through the pain and side-effects from the surgeries. Guts that I lack. 

For the first time, I managed to cook my instant noodles perfectly. I managed to get the amount of water right, the timing right, and the noodles were cooked. It's quite a feat because I'd usually end up with half-cooked noodles. I happily started on my noodles after I managed to cooked it so well, only to realise that I'd forgotten to add the seasoning in. The bowl of noodles was as bland as paper (yes, I've tasted paper many times while eating burgers). This is the second time I forgot. Cooking is troublesome! 

It seems that it's an unlucky day for me, since I burnt myself with the iron afterwards. I was ironing a few tees - those made of cotton are the only clothes my mum allows me to iron - when I burnt my arm. It's going to scar and it's kind of swollen now. It still hurts a little. 

You know what? I doubt I'll ever make a brilliant housewife. Maybe if I could get a rich tycoon for my husband, I'd be a rich taitai. I'd live my life attending high teas with other RTTs and get a butler at home. Haha. I think the pain is tampering with my mind now.